I am wanting to explore the line between reality|truth[?] that is: what is sharing and what is ego; what is telling and what is just plain old drawing attention to oneself; what is noise and what is silence...
...and after much thinking on this, I am pretty convinced that most of 'modern-day [read: The Internet] sharing' is nothing but drawing [or attempting to draw] attention to oneself, one's business, one's self-created awesomeness [be it retold with an "Ahh gee, look what I did---you really think I am great too? Gee" bent or in the intense thumping, SilverBack style, of and on one's chest] or one's thoughts [which are masked as 'what do you think?' when it really seems to be 'agree with me or else']...
in any case, a lot of self-absorption.
From Me, as well.
I think Warhol got it wrong by 2 minutes. It isn't 15 minutes of fame, it's 17... if you have a blog and/or Twitter account [and most everyone does].
But no more.
I liked it all better when few knew, most didn't care, and it was all small potatoes. Po-Ta-Toads [as Chloe would say].
I learned [still learn] a lot, made great lasting friends, great acquaintances, ran the gamut and gauntlet, but it's time to go away... and keep learning, listening and growing: just like before but without so much of me attached to the Me in Me/without so much noise from all the great warbled voices of everyone vying for something, what-I don't know any longer, but some Thing.
We, as a family, are shooting for a small, teeny-tiny life, far off and as invisible as possible from this EEEE-sized-Lectronic World: a place and space where I work on trying to not want nor need anything more than what's directly in front of me [baby-steps, some concrete, my wife, daughter & life].
A friend once suggested, "Close it down with some Thanks and lots of Apologies", so here goes:
Thank You, All. Thank you all very much, and profoundly so [even the dislikers & haters too]. I've learned something from all of it.
And yes, I am very sorry for any & all offenses... be them truthful [where I took well-aimed shots] or be it the ones that were built upon the dark human foundations of wanting more of something I could ever participate in or need or call my own [wanting to connect with so many folks that it was driving my soul mad], I am sorry. I have a hopeless side to me that wants to change people [the World] in equal proportion to changing myself [and it's called -I'm pretty certain- Ego].
And -again- I am very Thankful for all this place has done and shown me.
That's it... this journal stays for those seeking some solace for a process & journey [or to laugh -or rage- at me placing my foot in my mouth squarely, or me joking and some not getting it, or me not joking and some getting it], warts & all.
We're off & out to new things both small and low-key.
Here's to small & low-key...
my electronic netometer is now in perma-off-mode [blog, Twitter, all of it], but please do know-
Thank You for allowing me to share all that has come to be in the last few years,
Peace & Goodbye-
-Scott [LFoaB]
Keep Ridin'... Always
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